Honest Reviews, with a Potential for Snark.

 So I went to Jury Duty yesterday. I think maybe it might have been a tad surreal to have Steven Segal's classic "Above the Law" playing in the jury waiting room when we walked in.

I also just found out that there's going to be a live-action Yamato movie! Better known to English speakers as "Star Blazers," the animated TV show and movies of Japan's premier WWII sunken flagship resurrected as  a starship is as much a cultural icon to their island as the TARDIS is to Britain. It was also one of the first two "serious" animes to get translated and broadcast in the States (alongside Science Team Gotchaman, aka "Battle of the Planets," and before Robotech and Pokeman), because you can't call Speed Racer serious. (I'm having trouble calling "Battle of the Planets" serious, but the source material was much more grim.) Very little was changes in Star Blazers...they edited out the blood and made the saki "refreshing spring water to remind us of earth," but that was about it.

It's ludicrous in the extreme, but it's space opera, not science fiction, and when approached seriously as a live action pic, has some serious kickass potential. (the 30 sec TV teaser has some impressive CGI) Filming has wrapped, now there's 9 months of CGI and editing before the winter 2010 release. 

I'm curious how they're going to play Pappa Smurf...er, Desslok. In the original, he was an effeminate-looking guy with a deep, masculine voice that would make James Earl Jones feel all girly. In the US version, they gave him a sly holier-than-though smarminess that worked amazingly well and eventually made him one of the great anti-heroes in attitude and style, not unlike Avon from Blake's 7. 

Youtube links to the teaser and more, after the jump.

Filming: 9 Lonely, Burning Days out of 10
Acting: 8 Crowded, Cold Nights out of 10
Script: 8 Starving Vamps out of 10

Overall: 8.5 Plague Bats out of 10

Goes Well With: Blade 1 &2, Bladerunner, John Steakley's Vampire$, PN Elrod
Much Better Than: John Carpenter's Vampire$, Legion (apparently)

We were supposed to see Legion this weekend, but the reviews of it were SO bad that we're waiting for the DVD release, and Netflix. So we went to see Daybreakers instead, and I was really surprised at how good it was.

I shouldn't have been...the writers/directors were the brothers who brought us the Australian zombie flick Undead, with it's quirky sense of humor and a seriously off-center twist to the end (if you like zombie flicks, I highly recommend it). But Undead had a very loose low-budget feel that I wasn't sure would work with Daybreakers.

I needn't have worried. This film is slick, cold and twisted where it needs to be, warming and organic where it deserves it. The Brothers Speirig, when given a budget, know how to use it. They have talent coming out their ears, and they excell at taking a classic/tired tropes and turning them on their pointy ears. (It should be noted that work on  this film started  a little over five years ago, before the barrage of Twilight). This film is both a commentary on using up natural resources (with a sting about Big Pharm's attitude of "never the cure, always repeat business") , and a B-movie action horror. It starts out as a thriller, ends up a major fight, and that's throwing alot of reviewers...they think that if starts as Gattica, it should end at the same speed. They don't like the fusion.

Personally, I love it. Great set designs and cinematography that really sets the tone. Good performances from the cast (Dafoe is really top notch). Fun script that doesn't preach, but rather shows through actions. (It should be noted that the Speirigs aren't noted for their skill with dialog, but rather just doing interesting stories.)  I want to see more from these guys.

They also have the best website I've ever seen for a movie: http://daybreakersmovie.com/site/index.html It's set up like a very well done Blu-Ray menu.

Acting: 9 Time Travelers out of 10
Writing: 10  Coma-Dreams out of 10
Directing: 8 Derangements out of 10

Overall: 10 Gene Hunts out of 10

Goes Well With: An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge, A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court, 12 Monkeys, The Twilight Zone

 Here's an odd duck...we've got what's really one story with two main characters, each with their own arcs. Both series have won multiple accolades and manage to combine police procedure with modern period pieces and a dash of science fiction...or maybe coma dream drama. It's highly original speculative fiction of the kind that can send shivers down one's spine, in all the right ways.

First up, Life on Mars.

Unlike the US remake, the original BBC series was a smashing success. Sam Tyler, played by the charismatic John Simm, is a cop in 2006 that becomes the victim in a hit and run...and when he wakes up, he's in  1973. While he feels lost and disjointed, no one else thinks anything's strange; he's still Sam Tyler to them, but freshly transfered  from another department as the new 2nd in command to an investigative unit. Sam is a modern cop trying to deal with the brutality of police measures in the early 70's, and without the tech that he's used to having to solve his cases. His boss, Gene Hunt (Phillip Glennister in the role of a lifetime), puts up with Sam's weirdness because, despite the violence and the machismo Hunt exudes (King of his turf, indignant that the scum are stupid enough to challenge his peace on his watch), he's smart and, deep deep DEEP down, a good man.
This whole situation could easily be mishandled on the production front, but the series is written and directed with a strong eye for story and character, with the situation not being played for laughs or camp. Throughout Life on Mars (the title taken from the David Bowie song playing on Sam's radio when he's hit in 2006) is the question of whether Sam is an inexplicable time traveler, in a coma, or just plain nuts...or is it something more than that?
This seems to be answered in the final episode of the 2nd season, which would have wrapped everything up in a nice bow, except that the series got a sequel....

Ashes to Ashes (again, from a David Bowie song)

There should have been no way to make a successful follow up, but this show actually exceeds its progenitor (as I write this, the show is in hiatus until later in 2010, when the  final season of the whole story world airs). Alexandra Drake (Keeley Hawes) , a 2008  police profiler, is shot in the head by a suspect and winds up in 1981, in the exact same position as Sam Tyler, as the 2nd to Gene Hunt.  Again, we have a premise that should elicit groans, but aside from the first episode (which is a little TOO 80's in execution), the writing outdoes its predecessor as Alex discovers she's a few months shy of her parents' death in a car bomb, and sets out to stop it. The 2nd season of the show starts off a little rocky with a little less charm, but it soon becomes evident that everything's connected and there's a puppet master altering history through a web of corruption within the London Met (the city police).  Digging out the spider in the web leaves one hell of a Twilight Zone cliffhanger twist at the end, with one of the creepiest images I've ever seen on television, and leaves us chomping at the bit for third and final season...because it turns out that the creators aren't just using the show's concept as a wrapping to sell the story, they're exploring it from all angles, with a gleeful gleam in their eye.

Both series have a great way of Sam & Alex getting messages from the "future" ...radios spit out words only they pick up on, the TV does weird things when they're watching, and in Alex's case, the creepiest opera clown ever stalks her in a very cross (and later, revealing) manner. That clown is what ties the 1st season of Ashes to Ashes up in its own little bow, and has a great reveal in the final ep.

This is top notch storytelling, full of great characters and one hell of a speculative fiction tale. Highly recommended.

Acting: 10 Travelling Shows out of 10
Script: 9   Folk Tales out of 10
Filming: 10 Dutch Angles out of 10

Overall: 9  Hanged Men out of 10


Goes Well With: The Adventures of Baron Münchhausen, Mirror Mask

The odd thing about Terry Gilliam's new film (and Heath Ledger's last) is that it is a classic Southern US yarn about making bets with the devil, but filtered through British sensibilities rather than the Blues...which is not unlike American-born but British-warped Gilliam himself. Such a thing shouldn't work, but it does, brilliantly. Gilliam's odd camera angles and bizarre set design really work in this tale (which, like his Baron Münchhausen, stresses stories are what keeps the world alive), and the man has the talent to reign in that weirdness when dealing with the real world over the traveling troupe (if we're in the Imaginarium or their traveling, horse-drawn stage...which is like the one owned by the Players in Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead, but on the scale and claustrophobic interior of a 16th century ship...then the shots are all at kooky angles. If we're in the 'real world,' everything's perfectly normal shooting).

Gilliam's camera work often takes backstage to one of his great talents...getting fantastic performances out of his cast. This may be some of Christopher Plummer's finest work, and his daughter, played by the fey relative newcomer Lily Cole, almost steals the show. Andrew Garfield, playing her fellow actor Anton, has splendid comic timing and is makes his role shine. Verne Troyer, known mostly for over-the-top comedy roles such as Mini-Me from Austin Powers, gets to shine as the grumpy yet earthy Percy, Parnassus's aide and moral compass. And Tom Waits is the best Mr. Nick since John Glover's turn in the ill-fated Fox show, Brimstone.

Then, of course, there's Ledger, whose death occurred about 3/4ths of the way through shooting. Gilliam came up  with a beautiful way to save the film without re-shooting all of Ledger's existing scenes with a new actor; he devised a scenario where sometimes people changed appearances inside the Imaginarium (all of Ledger's filmed scenes took place outside of this mystical locale), and so Johnny Depp, Jude Law, and Colin Farrell do remarkably good impressions of Ledger's character's mannerisms inside the Imaginarium. 

The best way to see this film is to go in knowing as little as possible...and to take heed of an early line of "Don't worry if it doesn't make sense at first." Gilliam tosses us in with no explanation of the extreme weirdness at the beginning, but the script soon starts filling in the blanks after the initial acid trip. If the flick has drawn you interest and curiosity, but you're not sure, it's simple...if you like Gilliam's other films, especially Münchhausen and Time Bandits, you'll probably dig this one. It's a smaller, tighter film, more personal than most of his grandiose mental wanderings. 

If you've never seen a Gilliam film and wondered what all the fuss was about...this is a good start. Just be tolerant of the first two forays into the Imaginarium...the weirdness is explained, I promise. 

PS: Catch this quick, folks. Where I live, it's showing in about 8 theaters, but the majority only have one showing a day, for some strange reason. This isn't going to be out long.

Acting: 10 Italian Coffees out 10
Writing: 9 Single-Bed Hotel Rooms out of 10
Directing: 10 Lonely Hallways out of 10

Overall: 10 May-December Romances out of 10

Goes well with: Love Actually, Closet Land


Richard Curtis has had an interesting career. British comedy buffs know him as the mastermind behind The Black Adder BBC series. Romance buffs know him as the writer of Four Weddings and a Funeral, Love Actually, and many others. But this film is a tad unusual for him; normally a Curtis film hits the ground running, but this one starts and stops, dithers about abit awkwardly, and then suddenly launches forward with enough charm and poignancy to adore the film.

And it's done that way on purpose, from the dialog to the filming style to the superb performance by Bill Nighy. That man is a treasure, whether he's the charismatically vicious Viktor in the Underworld series or the past-his-prime rock star in Love Actually (which is wonderful film even for people who aren't romance buffs). I'll watch Nighy in anything...and believe me, the beginning of this film is so dry and awkward (two shy people thrown together try to get to know each other, and then he's obsessing on her and doesn't know how to handle it) that it was pretty much Nighy himself that kept me watching. Kelly MacDonald (the original State of Play BBC mini, Tristam Shandy, No Country for Old Men) is a wonderful "straight man" for Nighy's actions, grounding the picture while not trying to compete...she's quietly adorable and a solid counterpoint. She's so natural in the role it doesn't look like acting.

The framing of shots is not only gorgeously done, it's almost a supporting character in and of itself. David Yates (again, the original State of Play, the last three Harry Potter films) is a top shelf filmmaker, and used his framing to emphasize Nighy's character's loneliness. This could have easily have been bungled, either hitting the audience over the head by trying too hard, or else just coming across as weird, but the man has the rare eye of a world-class still photographer. You could capture about 230 frames from this film and use them as framed prints on your wall. It's stunning, and completely drives the point home to one's heart.

Plot-wise, the story's a bit non-traditional. Older lonely man accidentally meets younger woman and a relationship blooms, not out of sexual desire but out of sheer personality attraction and (here's that word again) loneliness. (Thanks to the aforementioned filming, they don't take too much time on him being alone...keeping the audience from getting bored.) But then things take an odd turn when he invites her to the G8 summit, where he's a financial advisor for the UK contingent, and a normal girl gets thrust in contact with the movers and shakers and starts to voice, inappropriately, her opinions on helping the poor and dying, a 5-year old G8 promise many countries are overlooking at the summit. This isn't the blundering of Bridget Jones (which Curtis adapted for the screen), but rather serious drama. (This would be where Closet Land comes into play.) This film is really two flicks in one...which is often how life works, and something Curtis has shown a fine hand in writing.

Is this a film for everyone? Certainly not. But it is very much a film for anyone who's a fan of anyone who loves any of the talent involved...they all shine...and a great introduction to them if you're new but love the quieter pictures that still manage, with top-notch acting and beautiful writing, to make you laugh and feel at the same time.

http://www.amazon.com/Girl-Cafe-Bill-Nighy/dp/B000A59PL0/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1263138303&sr=8-1

A bit drained by work and holidays. Rather than no reviews at all, I may convert to mini-reviews with the occasional long one.

SCRIPT: 8 out of 10 classic novels mined.
CGI: 6 for the faces, 10 for everything else (out of 10 Uncanny Valleys)
3D: 233.6 out of 10 yo-yos.
ACTING: 9 Overthethetopscenechewingbadguys out of 10
Directing: It's Cameron. Come on.


I was torn about seeing this movie. I'm an avid Cameron fan (although I never saw Piranha 2 or Titanic. The latter because I'm still not over my problem with James Cameron doing that story instead of a classic Clive Cussler tail, and we got stuck with Sahara instead. And ok, I hated Dark Angel. But really, I love the guy. For one thing, he's largely responsible for Director's Cuts being available). But the marketing on this movie...including a horrendous Jump the Shark episode of Bones where the entire B-plot of the episode was a geek out wankfest of the film, the worst kind of product placement...had really turned me off. Plus, Cameron waited a decade because he felt CGI wasn't up to snuff to handle things. Then he saw WETA's Gollum and started work...and gave us Elfquest characters that could have been done 8 years ago. The bastard children of Thundercats and Smurfs.

Well, folks, despite that...go see the film. In 3D. Multiple reasons follow:

One: The 3D effects are full immersion 3D. Up til now, most 3 movies look like animated ViewMaster slides...it's in 3D, but on different planes of movement, and the images are flat. Cameron not only invented new cameras for this (older cameras were the size of fridges, these are more manageable), but he made the whole thing immersion 3D, with the smarts not to do the "Hey...the spear is coming out of the screen at you....WOooOoooOo....duck!" tricks that pull attention to themselves. This sort of dedication needs our backing if we want to see more of this.

Two: The CGI for everything else. Seriously, the planet Pandora is gorgeous, and the standard Cameron sci-fi Military Porn Machine is in full swing. From the gorgeous huge Dragon Command Flier to the dual-rotor Scorpion attack copters to the absolutely fantastic mechs (Jim, your CGI company did the opening movies for Mechwarrior, can you do a movie? Please? And note to Microsoft...bring back the old cockpit versions of the games, not these stupid 3rd person shooters), they're all beautiful designs. The CGI flora and fauna are less photorealistic than they are fantastic fantasy paintings brought to life and beautifully rendered with their environment.

Three: Alot of people are going to like the story. Many are going to find it derivative of so many classic tales that it becomes a 2hr and 40 min film of telegraphed cliches. However, it should be noted that Cameron is at his best when playing in someone else's backyard (Terminator, Aliens), and I've always been of the opinion of cliches being perfectly valid if something new is brought to the table. Sure, my favorite films tend toward hitting you with an original twist (Fight Club, The Usual Suspects) or being a film that creates it's own wacked out genre (Clue, Nightmare Before Christmas, The 9th Configuration, Delicatessen)...but there's also room for those films that do cliches well (The Princess Bride, The Matrix). The magic's in the telling...and Cameron's not a master of this, but he's not offensive (unless you own the copyright). The reason he got the marks he did above wasn't for originality, but for the amount of story he crammed in. So many films are just ABC...this one is A 2 6 g 8 HL9Z. (And then he sunk the battleship.)

Four: James Cameron Action Sequences. In 3 motherfrackin' D. Absolutely stunning.

Cons: Not quite sure why everything on this planet has six legs save these things that look an awful lot like humans. Not sure why the women's faces and movements looks so much better than the men's. (It's not because I'm a hetero male, they really are better animated in expressions and body language.) The horrendous song at the end (were Sting and Bryan Adams not available? I thought I cringed at THEM on period pieces, this is so bad I actually wished for the obnoxious ass-hats that talked through half the film would come back and drown it out). (What's scaring me is "ass-hats" is in my spell-checker dictionary.) The tendency for long range shots of the mysteriously humanoid race to look like Gumby figures when viewed from afar. The font being that was-kinda-neat 20 yrs ago Papyrus one from Windows 2.0. The lack of credits at the opening, but that's a personal bug. The aforementioned media blitz, with blatantly false "I can't tell the difference between CGI and real people anymore" and "The eyes look so REAL" sound bites.

Those aren't enough to make it a bad film by any stretch of the imagination. Cameron's back, and while he may be tinged with some of the goof of Titanic, there's enough of the old master there to keep him from being compared to Lucas in the old-master/new-WTF debates.

PS: Weaver was 59 when she filmed this. No, she's not CGI'd.

CAST: 10 Toasters out of 10
WRITING: 10 Towels of of 10
DIRECTING: 9 VCRs out of 10

OVERALL: 10 Carols out of 10



If you've never seen this film, go get it. NOW.

Richard Donner (Superman, Ladyhawke) hits this one out of the park. It's one of Bill Murray's best comedic performances, alongside Stripes and Ghostbusters, but has more heart than anything he's done outside of serious drama. The ensemble cast is phenomenal, from the recognizable names (some of them early in their careers) to the incidentals. The writing is fantastic, part comedy, party really twisted Tales from the Crypt stuff. There's wonderful little touches, from how the Ghost of Christmas past...a puckish semi-demonic cab driver...travels through time to the wonderful detailing on the robe and face of the Ghost of Christmas Future (and the mist effects under the robe).

This is one of the great classic films of all time, let alone for the Holidays. The ending, with the entire cast singing "Put A Little Love in Your Heart" (and yes, it really is the cast), would make Wilford Brimley smile. If you haven't seen it, whatever the reason, now's the time.


PS: Karen Allen is, as always, adorable.
ADORABLE.

Writing: 9 The Stings out of 10

Acting/Casting: 10 Equalizers out of 10
Filming: 9 Vengeance Unlimiteds out of 10

Overall: 9 Leverages out of 10 (Would be 10 if not for 4^th season clunkers)

The First Rule of the Con: You can’t cheat an honest man.

You might think a show about con artists fleecing marks wouldn’t make a good series….one shot movies, sure. The Sting and Confidence are classic films. Sawyer and Kate on Lost make great characters in an ensemble, but an entire show devoted to a group of grifters? Wouldn’t the tricks get old, and how long can you make the audience root for the bad guys?

Ah…the first rule of the con. The writers on the British show Hustle, sidling up to its sixth season, have several tricks up their sleeves, the primary one being that our bad guys only go after marks that “deserve it” in one fashion or another. The audience wants the team to get these guys. Another trick to keep it interesting, keep the audience guessing…one method is to not always show a whole scene until the reveal at the end…you see just enough for a good, coherent story, but at the end, they often show you just a tad more of what happened after, and that puts a whole new twist on the story. (Some folks would consider this cheating…if you are one, this show may not be for you.) There’s the trick of freezing the action as the grifters walk about the silent statues, holding a discussion about how the con operates, so the audience is filled in…like Broderick’s breaking of the third wall in Ferris Bueller, this stunt works because it’s well done and not overused. Then there are the two most important tricks of all...the top-notch, smart writing and one of the best casts on television.

Leading the pack (for five of six seasons) is Mickey Stone, played by Olivier-winning actor Adrian Lester (best known in the US as Norton in Doomsday). Lester is Denzel Washington with the “class” trait turned up to 11. The man is smooth, quick, and a master of facial expressions. The new-kid on the team (and leader for Season 4) is Danny Blue, a quick scam artist who insinuates himself into the group to learn the long con. He’s cocky as hell, and played by the wonderfully insane Marc Warren (Wanted, Hogfather, the original State of Play miniseries). Warren is heir to Malcolm McDowell’s off-the-cuff masculine quirk, with the range and willingness to play everything from a cold killer to a child-like assassin to an Eddie Izzard-like oddball; his run as Danny Blue may be his best performance yet. And then there’s the woman…known to American audiences as Dexter’s psychotic sponsor in that show’s second season, Jaime Murray got her real start on this show, and is the epitome of exotically charming (and intelligent, to boot.)

But then there’s the two members who manage to be in all the seasons, and they’re the stalwart hearts of the show.

Robert Vaughn (The Magnificent Seven, The Man from U.N.C.L.E., The Towering Inferno) gives a sublimely understated performance as Albert Stroller, the man who trained Mickey Stone and the group's roper (the man who finds the mark). He is the grandfather to this family, the ultimate pro both in the show and behind the camera. Then there's Ash Morgan, the group's fixer (who does everything from making fake webpages to back up a con to "Ash, we need a few thousand bees, three identical briefcases and a squadron of WWI Spitfire 1:12 scale models"). Also a king of the understated, Robert Glenister's six seasons of this character actually outshine his brother's turn as DCI Gene Hunt in the original Life on Mars...and that's a feat so impressive, not even Harvey Keitel could manage it.

Add to this the fact that the casting team really know how to get the best for the incidental character-of-the-week slots (including some heavy names like Richard Chamberlain and Mel White), and you've got one hell of a mix.

The filming on this show matches the writing...top shelf, slick, yet not so impressed with itself it upstages the actors. It's like a fine silk suit or a little black dress, impressive, but always there to be worn by the cast, not the other way around.

The only real complaint is when Lester took a year off, and Warren runs the crew...and the fault isn't in the cast, but the writing. There are some real clunkers in the fourth season, notable mostly because the rest of the show is so bloody fantastic. After this season, Warren and Murray leave the show as Lester comes back, and are replaced by two actors whose characters are perfect substitutes...and can hold their own against this superb cast.

The cherry on top is the damn addictive music. I want a soundtrack. Now.

http://www.amazon.com/Hustle-Complete-Seasons-Adrian-Lester/dp/B00182Z7I4/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1258501391&sr=8-1

(Note: 6 episodes a season, so 24 episodes in that 4-season set...little less than two bucks an ep. Not bad for an import.)

PS: Speaking of Vengeance Unlimited, Michael Madsen has 44 projects in ‘09 & ’10. 22 haven’t come out yet. That’s….insane.

Story: 9 Red Candy-like Buttons out of 10
Cast: 8 Watery Gateways out of 10
Filming: 9 Inexplicable Nosebleeds out of 10
Music: 6 Little Keys out of 10

Overall: 9 Frank Langellas out of 10 (With the Caveat that you have to like this kind of movie.)


Goes well with: Invasion of the Body Snatchers, The Puppet Masters, Phantasm, In The Mouth of Madness, The Exorcist, The Martian Chronicles, Primer

Sadly, this is going to be short, for the same reasons this blog has been a tad quiet of late...Real Life (tm) has me by the nape of the neck. I say "sadly" because while the movie is getting decent reviews on the whole, alot of reviewers are missing the point. This movie needs folk's attention. And I should preface this by explaining that I am not a Donnie Darko cult member, and do not worship the director, hence the surprised icon on this review.

THE BOX uses a style of filmaking, using modern techniques, that we don't get too much of these days. It harkens back to the old science fiction horror stories that were made into pop culture by the Twilight Zone, but retain the harder adult edge of not just the ending sting, but the dual punch of dread and consequences. Like the classics of Bradbury, Ellison, and Campbell, it also requires you to think.

Given that the springboard is Richard Matheson's classic short story, "Button, Button," that's not surprising (unless you count the fact that nobody ever seems to adapt his classic works without seriously dropping the ball. Yes, I'm looking at you, I Am Legend). While that story wraps up in the first 30 minutes or so...and that's pretty much all you see in the trailers...director Richard Kelly (Donnie Darko) explores the reason for the Box existing, and the aftermath of what happens when someone presses the button. (For  those not familiar with the tale, a stranger arrives with a box. On the box is a shiny red button. If you press the button, you get a million dollars...at the cost of a stranger's life. After you make the decision, they take the box and give it to someone else...who you don't know.)  I can't go into any details without spoilers, but it's a wonderful mishmash of the Viking probe, creepy tell-me-it's-a-nightmare sequences, conspiracies, coincidences that aren't, and bizarre science. 

The overall effect is wonderful...if you like films of this nature. To many folks, this will be long, drawn out, and confusing, both because of the pacing and because audiences are used to being hit on the head with explanations, and this film is a prime example of "show, don't tell." The only time we get exposition is when there's something profoundish in the telling.  The acting of the leads didn't help (although the rest of the cast is superb, including Sam Oz Stone, who plays their son), but this is a damn good film, all told.

However, since it's #6 at the box office (even The Fourth Kind did better), making far less than it cost to produce, it looks like this film is destined to cult status; if this type of film is your cup of Ovaltine, catch it while it's still in theaters.

PS: Frank Langella is fantastic, as always.

 Evil Dead 2, Army of Darkness, Quick and the Dead....remember those?

Quirky filmming, manic energy, great chemistry. Snark galore.

Goofy TV shows, even.

Then Raimi got Spiderman. It seemed a match in heaven...who else could tackle the action and snark of the character so perfecttly?

Only there was a problem...Raimi took the most charming part of Peter Parker, the wisecracks of Spiderman, and pretty much tossed them out the window. Did he make a good movie? Sure. But it's like making a Star Wars movie without the charming rogue character...inconceivable. It neutered the charm.

I'm typing this as we're 3/4 of the way through Drag Me To Hell, and this is like some huge pratical joke. The film is HORRIBLE. This can't be Raimi. I mean, the film has NO chemistry...except for the kitten. The actors all seem to be photoshoped in from other films, not connecting with each other in any way. I mean, this film made Justin Long boring. How is that even possible? The lead actress constantly looks as if she's trying to remember her lines, or just plain confused. It has almost none of the Raimi quirks to the filming...it does have the trademark slapstick goo, but without the charm and the quirk ensemble, they just fall flat. The characters and plotting has more WTF moments than an Illuminati book, with no one acting properly to any situation...the main character bleeds violently over several people, and no one tries to get a doctor or even freaks out past "Did any get in  my mouth?" The frights are plodding and beyond cliche, the plot twists telegraphed from sometime back in 1912....the film is not disgusting because of what's in the film, but because of how much it proves Raimi has lost it. It's like finding your favorite uncle has dropped out of The Royal Shakespeare Company to become a mime in West Peru.

I miss the old clever, funny, manic Raimi. Where did he go, and when does he come back?

On the flip side, Russell Mulcahy (Highlander) did a great job with Resident Evil 3,  Great Mad Max vrs Zombie flick, especially the bird sequence. It's heads and shoulders above the mess of the second film.

 Let's face it folks, it hasn't been since first season, with the exception of the Fun With Sylar bits...him trying to go straight, followed by the climax of last season.

Aside from just being a bit of a mess in general, what the last few seasons have lacked was 1st season's soul...a sense of wonder and awe at things. This season is bringing it back, slowly, with the advent of a not-born-deaf woman who suddenly is able to see sounds (which can't be synthenesia because you have to be able to HEAR the sounds to cross the sensory wires) as well as a uniquely travelling carnival of ability-enhanced individuals, led by the excellent Robert Kneppler with occasional appearances from Ray Park, known to most as the Toad & Darth Maul, who seems to be Seth Green's long lost acrobatic brother. While the former is a scowly, put-upon woman discovering the awe and wonder of this new world...as the audience did in first season, alongside our mains, the latter is closer to Something Wicked This Way Comes, with its entrancing sense of awe masking a dark side...although it seems more likely that they're not evil, just amoralistic when it comes to keeping the family safe. What's a little callous murder if it manipulates things for the better of the family?

The scripts have been better this season, partially due to Bryan Fuller, but this past Monday's was not his, and it was excellent. The acting is better (even from the mains, who were never shabby. As noted in an earlier article, Claire's actress has pegged it to 11 this season, and Sylar's keeps pushing the boundries of what he can do...especially nice given he was merely decent in 1st season. The man is seriously fun to watch in anything he does these days.)

Let's hope they can win back the ratings, because the show's found its feet again.

If you look at ratings (in the US) vrs smart shows, one can see why they get canceled so often. In can lead one to think that most of the US population are blatant idiots (let's not argue the other evidence, it's besides the point in this rant)...however, ratings are biased. 

Think about it. How many Nielsen families do you know. If you know any, are they the type to watch the smart shows? (If they are, or you're one of them, chances are it's an anomaly and should be supported as a rebel mental freedom fighter!)

There's a reason for this...advertisers don't normally want to advertise to smart people. Priscilla Spencer recently tweeted an interview with Emmy-winner Leo LaPorte, one of the media tech masters, about this subject. (LaPorte was one of the people huge with TechTV, which was bought out by a gaming channel that made MTV look like a focused med student in comparison. Tech TV was killed after the buyout.)

In the interview (and headlining the article surrounding the video) is a great story expanding on this point.
****
 Leo says that back in the day, after explaining to a TV exec that it’s worth targeting a small group of smart computer enthusiasts, the exec told him:
Advertisers don’t believe it’s worth advertising to smart people, because smart people don’t pay attention to brand. Smart people make an actual choice, they can’t be tricked or convinced. They research. So we can’t sell ads to a network for smart people.
Then Leo said, “Suddenly television makes sense, doesn’t it?” to a great big laugh.
****
As such, the Nielsens give the impression that the US is full of people that wouldn't know smart, makes-you-think entertainment if it had a chalkboard and a lecture hall. It's a slanted numbers game, because the Nielsens exist for advertisers (and networks to get advertisers to fork over cash), not as an actual readout on US consumer/viewer tastes. 

So the smart programs have to reside on special networks with targeted audiences (which does work...the Equalizer stayed on the air for years despite ratings at the bottom of the networks, because of a specific target audience advertisers were willing to pay for), or to get tricky and slip the smart stuff in with other things that hook an audience that wouldn't normally watch such things. JJ Abrams (and his wingmen) & Bill Prady are experts at this, with Ron Moore being hit & miss. 

Cherish the smart ones, folks. Cherish them.

The Leo LaPort (thanks, Priscilla) article is here: http://smarterware.org/3647/leo-laporte-on-advertising-to-smart-people

I know alot of you are staring at me like a loon. But quite simply, David E. Kelley in wacky mode, be it Boston Legal or Ally McBeal, is a joy to behold. Yes, the show is girly compared to Boston Legal. So?

Kelley has a knack for oddball situations and characters that's well into the genius range. While Alan Shore from Boston Legal may be one of the best characters to ever grace the small screen, it all really started here at Cage & Fish...and John Cage and Richard Fish are characters so oddball that trying to keep up with them is like running a marathon. With a top-notch ensemble cast brimming over with talent (including Jane Krakowski, Lisa Nicole Carson, Courtney Thorne-Smith, Lucy Liu, and Peter MacNicol...although I'm not sure how Gil Bellows got in there, he looks lost most of the time), and a much maligned leading lady (yes, she's a stick, get over it, she's got great facial expressions and a knack for physical comedy), all backed by excellent writers, the only thing the show truly misses is a sense of gravitas that Boston Legal wore like a cape.

And honestly, that's ok. Ally McBeal is a three ring circus, run by the clowns...although, sometimes, the clowns manage to pull the heartstrings as well as make you laugh.

Does the show try too hard? Sometimes, but hey, every show has its up and downs.


But seriously, folks....Cage & Fish. CAGE & FISH.

The series has finally been released in the US (it's been availble in snibbits here, but it's been available in its entirety overseas for ages) for a quite reasonable price. Knowing how long I've been lamenting the injustice of the lack of this show (along with Brimstone, Max Headroom, and others), my girlfriend surprised me with a set this weekend, "for being a good boyfriend."  Woo!

http://www.amazon.com/Ally-McBeal-Complete-Calista-Flockhart/dp/B002DYJ520/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1255442007&sr=8-1

NOTE TO TIGER DIRECT.COM: You're usually so good about this...but 20 bucks off a 800+ buck camera is not an INSANE CLEARANCE special. Please come back down to earth and stop acting like Buy.com. You're already the Guitar Center of the internet.


PARANORMAL ACTIVITY: Worst Ad Campaign ever. If it it hadn't been getting good reviews and buzz from Sundance (and a friend of mine actually knew people who had seen it), I'd have zero interest. "Here's the audience watching our movie! AWESOME!" does not inspire me to go see it. Tell us something about the film, show us the product. (Although, honestly, a pitch of "couple film themselves sleeping to see if there's anything supernatural in the house" is not grabbing me, here.) Don't just show us outtakes of audience reactions to a naked John Lithgow in Dexter.

DR. WHO: For those of us who can't get to the UK Dr. WHo site because we're stuck elsewhere in the world, I have it on good authority (thanks British Jim Butcher fans!) that the final two Tennant specials will not air this year. Rather, one will...the normal Christmas special...followed by the end of the best Doctor to date* sometime in January. Then the launch of the new leading man with the best British Screenwriter in the business at the healm (Moffat, creator of Coupling, Jeckyl, The Fatal Death comedy special for Children in Need, and the majority of the great Eccleston & Tennant scripts).

TIMOTHY HUTTON ATTACK: Nero Wolfe followed by Leverage. My brain hurts.

BIG BANG FOR THE BUCK: Big Bang Theory's back to being one of the best shows on the air, almost as good as How I Met Your Mother (interesting fashion our leading ladies are pioneering due to the Real Life kids.)


*I love all of them, especially Tom Baker, but Tennant's the best, sorry.


 

 The Mongolian bovine monkey zombie flu has kept me from being able to type straight for a while, sorry for the absence. (It's a great diet, though.)

Meanwhile, some ramblings:

Thanks to work plus the mongolian zombie-weasle death flu that a co-worker gave me, I've been absent from here. So here's a few quick notes:

CASTLE: Great start to the new season. Love the new opening. And who knew SJC could actually act as well as write and produce? (All of Castle's poker games that don't involve russian gangsters are filled with real life mystery writers...before he was a novelist, Cannell was Mr. Television. Remember the production sting at the end of your favorite 80's shows who snatched a page from the typewriter and tossed it over his shoulder make the C logo? No? Well, lookee at his creds: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0004798/ )

HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER: Great opening ep. Fantastic, creative dodge to avoid people pouring over every episode this season to determine who in the giant lecture hall would be "The Mother." Kudos to CBS for putting this online...minus severl million for having the world's worst buffer programming so a 22 min show turned into 49 mins.

BIG BANG: Opener was far better than the finale from last year. Yay! Also the numbers here were incredible. Sadly, the mosty geeky mainstream show on TV still isn't available for download.

Blast from the part: THE DARK HALF: It's a crying shame this film only exists in a 4x3, might-as-well-be-VHS DVD. It's George Romero's best crafted film. It's one of the best adaptations of Stephen King. And Timothy Hutton's dual performance in this is utterly amazing.  He manages to make Stark the bastard child of Tommy Lee Jones and the darkest, twisted side of Michael Keaton. Yes, cute old Hutton does a mean southern hoss so well I've won bets from people who swore it wasn't the same actor.
http://www.amazon.com/Dark-Half-Timothy-Hutton/dp/0792841328/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1253823334&sr=8-2

 They've retooled Fringe into a US version of Torchwood, complete with the stylized meanicing hero's walk towards the camera, and I think the show may benefit from it.

S2's opening shot was very well done. FOX seems to realize they may have their next Xfiles, as they've tteamed in with Bones and have been promoting the hell out of the show.

Side note: Dalls, Tx's Fencon, where I am right now, is in the hotel we used to love to host Akon in, before the animation con got too big. Woo! And the staff of this con are amazingly organized. I love 'em.

 Sadly, another quick review, as I have to head out to a convention. But this film was too good to not at least mention.

Acting: 9 thumbprints out of 10
Writing: 9 thumprints out of 10
Filming: 8.5 thumbrints out of 10
Music: 8 thumbprints out of 10

Overall effect: 9 thumprints out of 10

Goes well with: Dexter, Collateral

I've always maintained that when cast correctly, Kevin Costner is a damn good actor. The problem is, he uses the writer's creed (write what YOU want to write), which doesn't really work for him. Sorry, Mr. Costner, you're not the fluffy leading man hero type...you're at your best when you play someone cold (no Big Chill jokes, I promise), quirky (Bull Durham), or downright creepy.

He shines in this film.

Mr. Brooks is a film about addiction...it just so happens that the monkey on his back is murder. He's a recovering, never-caught serial killer known as the Fingerprint Killer, and he managed to stave it off for two years before his alto eager/inner voice Marshall, played with subdued, wonderful glee by William Hurt, finally gets him to give in for another Fingerprint Killing the night Brooks is made Portland's Man of the Year. The man who's anal and never leaves a trace screws this one up, and a voyuer (Dane Cook) catches him...but doesn't want to turn him in, he wants him to keep killing and bring him along as well.

So now Mr. Brooks, trying so hard to break his addiction and be the man everyone thinks he is (charitable, respectable business owner and family man) has two voices urging him forward to kill again.

Add to this Demi Moore (who's gotten very good over the years) as a cop with a good track record for catching killers, a subplot with a daughter who mysteriously returns from college that turns more sinister with every act, and another escaped serial killer on the loose, and it sounds like you'd have a mess.

But Mr. Brooks is finely crafted thriller. What's even more surprising is that it's from folks that are  known for family entertainment, like Starman and Honey I Shrunk the Kids. 

The filming is top notch, smooth and crisp and clean. The dialogue is spot on, and even the music is fantastic. Seriously, folks check this flick out.

PS: If you're looking for gore, this film doesn't have much. Mr. Brooks usually kills cleanly, with a silenced pistol. There's one scene that may make some twitch, but this is a film about characters and addiction...like Dexter, it's not about the blood.


The excellent trailer: http://www.apple.com/trailers/mgm/mrbrooks/

Buy it at: http://www.amazon.com/Mr-Brooks-Blu-ray-Kevin-Costner/dp/B000VD5I8K/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1253193778&sr=8-2

Real life kept me from the theaters this weekend, so I missed the adaptation of Greg Rucka's WHITEOUT and the release of 9...how was it? I've not heard good things about story and pacing.

Quick notes:

Tried to watch Ghost Town this weekend. I wanted to like it, I really did. I like David Koepp. I'm not into Ricky G, but I don't hate him either. And I like Mrs. Mulder, though she hasn't shined nearly as bright as when she had her own show or was in Bad Boys. But we just couldn't make it through the film.

The Soloist was gorgeously directed and beautifully acted. Best film ever? No, not remotely. But everyone really gave this flick all their love. Robert Downey Jr is always good, and Fox proves once again that he is a fantastic actor, despite his early career's suggestion that he was just a comedic personality. Keener is also damn good in this film.